Wednesday, July 17, 2013

My Birthday

Hey! How're you all? I know I've been kinda offline for a bit but I thought it was about time that I posted an update.

I had my 17th birthday on Tuesday last week, and it was awesome :D I got some money, an awesome satchel (I'm refusing to call it a manbag) and a great headset :)

Other than my birthday I've just been enjoying the holidays and not doing so much. I finished the Gone series, which was, woah, an awesome ending XD I also got Uglies by Scott Westerfield for my birthday, and I'm just starting to read that. I've been told by a lot of people it's a great dystopian series and it has this really cool theme running through the whole thing. I'm sure it'll be worth the read.
Next on my list to read is TFIOS, even if I'm late by like 6 months .__. I'm just gonna buy it with my birthday money so I can finally understand what all the fuss is about.

In other news, I'm now fully up-to-date with Homestuck and I've forced my older brother to get into it just so I can have someone to talk to about it.
Oh, and I've been writing a bit more. Can someone poke Mar and tell her that she never wrote an AU OC story? ;_; I had to go ahead and write a bit about it just cos the backstories were so interesting. So no, I don't have any idea how far this could go or if it's a once-off thing, but here's some story that should be mildly interesting and capture your attention for a couple of minutes.

Right now I've only written about Skyril and Kal's characters, and then I'll write a bit about mine and try hopelessly to tie it all together. I was just looking at the history of the characters and then I had to sit there and work out all the birth dates of everyone and change the story idea a tiny bit- it doesn't matter, it won't become relevant until much later, if at all xD 
So here's the links to the OC's and then here's the story. 

“Dammit,” the nervous teenager said, kicking his locker in frustration. The code for the padlock wasn’t working. Again. Five hundred lockers for five hundred kids in this school, and they just had to give him the only faulty one. The bell had gone five minutes ago, the hallways were empty, and there was no way he’d survive a double biology prac without his gear. He had a sudden and terrifying image of himself standing at the bench in front of the class with no experiment to show them, while the teacher shook his head in the corner, marking him down one grade for each minute he stood around doing jack shi…
“You must be joking me,” said a voice from down the corridor. “This has got to be the fourth, no, fifth time in two days that you’ve broken your locker, Isaac.”
He gave a sigh of relief as he turned to face her. “I didn’t break it, and you know it. Come on, I’m already five minutes late, Scar.”
“I told you not to call me that in public, Isaac,” she tutted. “To every teacher and every student, my name is just Sally.” She didn’t mind the name, but it wasn’t hers, and therefore it annoyed her.
He sighed again, this time in exasperation, and gestured to the multitudes of students currently not crowding the hallway.
“Hang on, let me just get my pickpocketing equipment,” Scarlet Sky Hope said sarcastically as she reached inside her school blazer pocket, rummaged around, and pulled out her hand again, this time with the middle finger pointing straight up. He rolled his eyes and she laughed as she flexed her fingers and took hold of the padlock. “Who am I kidding- I’ve never needed lockpicks before and I don’t need them now. Abracadabra!
The padlock glowed faintly indigo underneath her palms, there was the tell-tale ka-click sound of success, and Isaac could have hugged her if he wasn’t already focused on snatching up all the biology-related contents of his locker.
“OhmyGodthankyouheapsScaryou’rethebestcyalater!” he managed before sprinting down the hallway. Scarlet shook her head with a smile and closed his locker for him, keeping the padlock undone in case he came back.
She then wandered to her own class; Art. The teacher airily greeted her and then drifted back to her place at the window, humming as she went. Half a dozen other students filled the large room, all working on their own pieces with a laid-back focus. That’s what Scar liked so much about Art; there was barely a curriculum. Just express yourself, and have fun while you’re at it.
Scarlet reached the drying rack and pulled out her own artwork. The teacher paused her humming and noticed that Scar was about to set up and continue painting.
“I’ve observed your work over the past few weeks,” she said as Scarlet placed the canvas on an easel and readied her paintbrush. “You’re definitely improving. I’ve wanted to know- what’s the subject matter? The theme? All I see is the obvious, but what lies beyond it?”
Scarlet cocked her head and scrutinized her own work. The door she had painted in her artwork was simple enough; a dark green, wooden door without a doorknob. It was old and weathered, even though the lock appeared to be shiny new brass. Roughly cut into the door were the words “KEEP OUT” and the initials “J.S” underneath the warning.
“The theme?” Scarlet repeated, to herself more than anything. “Mystery, I guess. A secret.”
The teacher smiled. “Well then- what’s the secret? What lies behind the door?”
“Honestly, Miss Sherwood,” Scarlet said, dipping her brush into the green paint again. “When I find out, you’ll be the first one to know.”

Behind a green wooden door in a cold house, a man gritted his teeth in pain and applied more pressure to his bleeding leg.
“Jesus,” he breathed, struggling not to panic. He couldn’t panic; not just yet. So he gave himself a short list of instructions.
“Get more bandages.” He reached a hand onto his desk from the position he was in on the floor and grasped around until his fingers clasped a fresh roll of bandages.
“Healing salve.” Come on, where was it. The drawer? No, no, no. His black satchel.
His black satchel, which was on the other side of the room.
Somewhere in the house, the front door opened and shut. “Hello? I’m home. John?”
Shit. Shit and damn. She’d be a couple of minutes though. She wouldn’t come up here straight away, right?
“Looksss like you have sssome company, Mr Sssmith…”
The Target whispered with his forked tongue on the other side of the door. Well, he had been the Target an hour ago. Then the tables turned when John Smith, professional assassin and hitman for hire, had tried to snap his neck and found out the creature didn’t seem to care which way his head was facing. He wasn’t so much a Target anymore as an evil Snake-Man-Thing.
Then came the leg wound and the hobbling back to safety, the inevitable chase up the stairs and finally the part that John was living through now- facing off a murderous snake-man on the other side of the green, wooden door. The hunter had become the hunted, with only one flimsy door between him and death. And then the snake-man would go to his younger sister.
He was half-way across the floor towards the satchel.
“John? Are you upstairs? God, are you in that room again? You spend all your time up there. At least you could say hello to me.” John wasn’t paying attention. He was in range of the bag. Where the hell was the healing salve?
His sister grew impatient. “Right, I’m coming up there. You said you were gonna fix the TV today anyways, and if you’re not doing that then I swear to God…”
“Ssshe’s coming thisss way, Mr Sssmith. Better open thisss door, sssoon. Wouldn’t want her to sssee me, would you…?” The whispering snake-man was messing with him, but he was right. But he had to get the healing salve applied properly. Ok, that was good enough. Then the bandages. Come on, John. Hurry the hell up!
Footsteps on the stairs. It was dark in the house, so she wouldn’t see the snake-man until she was right behind him. And then he would turn, snake eyes gleaming, wrap his hands around her throat and squeeze
He eyed the shotgun grip protruding from his satchel as he tightened the bandages and tied them off. His bag was full of extra clothing for emergencies. Perfect. He might make it. He might actually make it.
“Mr Sssmith…”
“You want in, you serpentine bastard?” he stood on unsteady feet and picked up his shotgun, muzzle still stuffed in the clothes-filled bag. He flung open the door and the creature lunged forward, forked tongue flicking crazily. John sidestepped, pushed the satchel into the back of the snake-man’s head, and pulled the trigger.
The explosion of borrowed human skin, scales, and slimy green blood slapped wetly upon the wall above John’s desk. The satchel full of clothes did its job of muffling the gunshot and only letting a soft whump sound escape the room.
His sister was at the top of the stairs.
John dropped the gun and staggered back across the room to the door. He slipped outside, shutting the door behind him with a soft click and turning to bump straight into his sister.
“John! For God’s sake, could you answer me the first time I call you?” Scarlet frowned and leaned to the side, peering around him and at the green door he blocked with his tall frame. She sighed. “You haven’t been fixing the TV, have you? I bet- oh my God, what happened to your leg?”
“It’s nothing,” John grunted, limping down the stairs. “Just fell over at work today. Hospital didn’t release me till an hour ago. That’s why I haven’t touched the TV yet. Could you get me some water? I’ve had a long day.”
He had said it all so fast, Scarlet barely had time to ask him what the whump sound had been. And she swore he had been talking to someone. “Yeah, sure,” she replied, eyes lingering on the green door for only a second longer before she turned and followed him down the stairs.
And all the while, John Smith thanked the heavens in silent relief.

1936, somewhere in Romania.  
It’s a tedious business, organizing your own death.
The funeral itself was relatively easy, Raphael Pendragon thought to himself as he climbed to the top of the treacherous waterfall overseeing the town he lived in. It was the death that often caused all the problems.
Most importantly, of course- how to go. Raphael- or Raff, as he was used to being called, had only recently begun to think the possibilities through. Rope? Too stereotypical. So was going using a rifle. And the problem with those was that they were all up close and personal. He had to do something flashy, something that wouldn’t leave anything behind for loved ones to mourn over.
Raff whistled while he climbed.
Now, he had originally thought about using fireworks- he still had a friend over in China who could give him more than enough fireworks to leave nothing but ashes and his scuffed shoes. But that just seemed a bit too silly. Fireworks, really? He’d be making them laugh with joy before they realized he was gone.
The next obvious choice now rushed before him; the waterfall.
It was high, he knew that much. He drew a pocket watch from his jacket and threw a stone over the edge, counting the seconds before the splash. Six seconds. Well, at least he’d have a long six seconds to think about how stupid this probably all was. Hang on, though, he was heavier than a stone. So wouldn’t he fall quicker? He might only get three seconds.
Raff shook his head to get rid of the thoughts. It didn’t really matter.
He turned to the cloth-wrapped item he had brought with him for the climb. By the faint light of a cold dawn, Raphael unwrapped the painting and marvelled for a second at his own artwork. He wasn’t all that self-absorbed, but even he couldn’t help smiling.
The painting depicted the basement area of an old property he owned, a room he had secured without anyone knowing. Most of the picture was taken up by a large bed with a comfortable mattress and all the pillows he owned. He had been very thorough in his preparation for this day. He had spent all week diving into a secluded lake, trying his hardest to hit the water in the same precise spot every time.
The sun was rising. The town would be waking soon, and gather in the town square as they usually did on a Sunday. He would miss that particular part of his everyday life, as well as the mortals who had given him company. But there was no other option. He had to start anew. They’d get over him, in time.
Raphael held the painting in front of him and dropped it straight down. By magic or sheer luck, the painting stayed the right up as it descended, landing on the surface of the water and sinking slowly to the bottom. It was relatively shallow where he had dropped the painting, he knew that. It was the kind of place people didn’t expect you to jump, unless you were stupid. Or you had a deathwish. To be honest, Raff was neither.
Raff looked on as the sun rose, and all the little figures from the town slowly trickled to the square. One by one, they noticed him, pointing and alerting the other members of the small town. Before they could say a word to him, Raff did a casual salute and said his goodbyes. They were quick, and quite frankly, unheard, due to the loud sound of rushing water. A few members of the town were just about to tell him this, when he smiled and leapt over the edge.
Three seconds, he thought as his body arced not-so-gracefully through the air and began to angle towards the water and rocks below. This really was a stupid idea.
I wonder if I’ll miss the painting.
Two seconds.
I bet I’ll miss it.
One second.
Oh God please don’t let me miss-
And then he hit the water.
His arms were outstretched, and the moment they touched the painting below, they simply slipped through. His body followed suit until he was completely through the painting and out the other side. He flew through the air for a frightening second before landing softly onto the pillow-ridden bed in his basement.
“Oof,” he grunted. His suit was soaked, and soon the bed would be too. Despite this, he couldn’t help grinning a little after pulling his little prank.
It was a tedious business, organizing your own death. But he had managed, and now he was free from being drawn into arguments from his parents, free from his slightly boring life with the mortals… No one would bother him again.
Raphael Pendragon was dead, yet only now could he really start living. 

Alright. Hope you guys enjoyed that :) More to come soon, I suppose.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.


    I hope you had a fantastic day. I'm sorry I couldn't celebrate it with you on the day. In any case, have fun being 17. Savor being (legally) a minor while you can! >:P Best wishes.

    As an update, this is post #88. 22 more posts to go before the grand centennial!

    You writing is brilliant as always. No matter what you want to do with your life in the future, please continue writing. Your work (I refuse to simply call it a 'story' - It is far more than that) has reached a level of professionalism and intricacy that is rare in the writing world. Your ideas have a subtle flair and uniqueness and you can always pull off humor.
    This one in particular is quite exceptional - I love the fact that you are investigating everyone histories. And if you ever need another character, you know where to find me... But if you do actually want my OC, ask me for it (by email or otherwise) and I'll email it to you pretty quickly. The one(s) on Biorama is(are) not right.

    In any case, thank you again for posting! I was starting to worry... And in a mere 22 posts time, we can celebrate the centennial of Hellboy's Blog! Thank you for sharing your brilliance, and it is always good to hear from you.

  3. I'm glad you had such a good birthday. Although it's not six months late, more like 18 :P

    Anyway this is brilliant, brilliant writing. You have taken the characters and just used them amazingly.

    It's always great to have another post from you. As Rosella said your work is of a truly professional standard.


  4. JOE
    That was AWESOME!
    I so especially loved the part with Scar and John Smith. Literally, seriously, I could never have done a better job of writing their characters!
    And I adore the way your portrayed Raphael too. How he died..., but could now really start living... I just...

    I love this paragraph:

    "He had said it all so fast, Scarlet barely had time to ask him what the whump sound had been. And she swore he had been talking to someone. “Yeah, sure,” she replied, eyes lingering on the green door for only a second longer before she turned and followed him down the stairs.
    And all the while, John Smith thanked the heavens in silent relief."

    I really hope you write more because you absolutely get the feeling of the character just right, or, really, even better.

  5. Ok, by the way- just pointing out-!
    You, and I, Kal, AND Raven are all currently 17.

    I feel special!

    And I came up with the plan for our future. The four of us are going to buy a building to make into a used bookstore, and we won't have to hire anyone because we'll take turns running it and writing our stories when no one's shopping, and we'll split the costs and earnings of the bookstore as money on the side while we become famous. :]

    Just saying.
    What do you think of that idea??

  6. I haven't read TFIOS either..., and I really need to start reading Homestuck! I totally forgot about that ~headdesk~

    Anyway, I re-read my about-your-FF comment, and I didn't say enough. It is so good. And Isaac called me Scar! I love that nickname >.<.
    Where did you come up with the idea for the serpent man btw? Definitely a new one. Man, now I want to see a serpent man in Derek Landy's books. Why hasn't he written something like that? The cover-quote could have been something like, "Are you a man- or a serpent?".
    Well, I just watched Despereaux last night, and when they were judging him, they said, "Are you a man- or a mouse?" because he was too brave and uncraven to be a mouse... I thought it was witty to say it with a backward meaning... Anyway.

    Hope you write more of this FF.

  7. A You Quote

    "i guess that when i first heard u guys mentioning Johnny depp, i thought charlie and the chocolate factory, and then tried to match that up with skuldugery pleasant. it didnt work very well..."

    Lol, you are awesome >.<

    1. That made me laugh so hard. People are probably wondering if I'm high... or something.

      So, my brother John was reading this real book... I mean I non-fiction book [which normally bore me], but it was about this old guy who had worked as a hotdog stand manager in the French Quarter [which is a place in New Orleans if you are unaware]. Anyway, somebody asked him a favor to be in charge for a week, and he agreed. So, he goes into this building on day 1, and he sees the safe open, all the money gone, and girl sitting nearby, obviously on drugs, giggling with a noose around her neck.
      He asks her where the night manager is, and she tells him on a train to so-in-so with the money. He says, "Well, does the day manager know about this?" And she giggled, saying something like, "I should hope so, she's with the night manager on the train."
      He calls up the owner and says, "So do you want the good news or the bad news?"
      "Um, give me the bad news."
      "The day manager has run off with the night manager and all the money from the safe."
      "Well what's the good news?!?"
      "The girl I found with a noose around her neck is still alive."

      Isn't that something?

      Sorry for the randomness. It just made think about that xD

    How did I ever forget that you write poetry?

    The Morning Mist

    Thick, heavy silence.
    This is not any ordinary fog.
    Obscuring all, it descends.

    A silhouetted figure.
    Hunched in the distance.
    A vague image,
    Seen as if it is hiding behind a slightly opaque wall.

    It turns its shadowy head,
    And stares
    With it’s white, lifeless eyes.
    A whine, a moan, a murmur,
    A mutter.
    Its whispers
    Become clear:
    Leave me alone.
    And then, as quickly as it arrived,
    It disappears.
    Fades into nothingness,
    Along with the fog.
    And the sky clears,
    Making room for a new day.

  9. SP quote!

    "I see you've rescued the corpse."
    "Yes. He's dead."
    "Corpses usually are."
    "We'll take him to the car."
    She nodded. Bit her lip.
    "What?" Skulduggery asked. "What's wrong?"
    "Well, I don't mean to sound disrespectful or anything, but it might be weird, being in a car with the remains of a dead man..."
    "You *do* realize that I'm the remains of a dead man too, don't you?"
    "I know, yeah, don't smell."

  10. Insanity Moonshine said...

    ok then, io guess i shall use a mind erase bomb *sets bomb for memory* ok, this should do *sets off bomb*

    skyril said...

    Hahaha Moonshine I.....I....
    Hmm...Weren't we just talking about something??

  11. Insanity Quote!
    Doesn't this remind you of Kal?

    "*sits in a swivle chair and turns m back to you, then turns around while clapping my hands in a dramatic matter* well done inferno, but you seem mistaken, for the utler didnt kill miss peacock. I DID! and it wasnt at four o clock. IT WAS AT FOUR O ONE!"

  12. LOL, so I say the same comment twice... in one comment. The following comment states:

    Oops I don't know how that happened....
    I mean....of what are you all speaking????
    Have you all bumped your head and are now seeing double??....


    "people who follow rules do not come to me," replied China."Which explains why I speak to the both of you with some regularity."
    -China Sorrows


    "people who follow rules do not come to me," replied China."Which explains why I speak to the both of you with some regularity."
    -China Sorrows

  13. Ooooh yeah.... I always thought this was very good to know... I wondered what took him so long... YOU QUOTE:

    *starts crying*


    *throws self over the same cliff edge that Mr. Bliss pushes Skulduggery off of*


    *collides with Skulduggery on his way up*

    *Skulduggery catches me and hovers in midair*

    "Oh hello there...What on earth are you doing here?" (SP)

    *stares in shock* YOU!

    (yeah ^thats^ me)

    "Well of course it's me! I can only BE me, you see. Unless of course, I am someone else...." (SP)

    *stares at Skulduggery*

    *Skulduggery stares back*

    *stares at Skulduggery*

    *Skulduggery stares back*

    "You know, I know someone quite like you. She stares almost as much as you do. In fact, she's right up this cliff, if you would like to meet her..." (SP)

    *dies in complete shock*

    "Oh well. I guess I'll see you later then. Or maybe not. Seeing as how your already dead and all..." (SP)

    *chucks body back into sea and rises up to meet Valkyrie*

    THIS is why Skulduggery took so long coming up from the water after he had been pushed off the edge in book 1.

  14. SP quote!

    "How long have you been watching my house"
    "Uh three months"
    "And what is the result of your'e investigation? Has my house been involved in any illegal activities? Has it robbed a bank? Has it mugged anyone?"
    "Has it moved even a little?"
    "I don't.. think so.."
    "Made a prank phone call?"


    LYNITH! IT IS ALL A LIE! (so is the cake, but that's another story, folks!) SKYRIL IS NOT TELLING THE TRUTH!


    It really went like this.....

    skyril was all like "im so damn happy that lynith isnt here! XD" thhen i was all like "how could u? we all love lynith around here" and then she was all like "but shes always so stupid and all" and then insanity was all like "lets sacrifice her to derek" and then skyril was all like "yeah!ive still got an altar!" and then kirsty was all like "ummmmm" and then Derek was all like "Heyyy, no need to sacrifice her, i already hired an assasin!" and then skyril+insanity were all like "oohh ok" and then i was all like " no way man! u cant assasinate ur greatest fan" and then i all like broke the ninja leprecaun rule NO 1, (which is always listen to derek) so i could destroy the assasins which looked like super cute cats but then i was all like "whhhaat!!" and they were all like "mmewieiwoeoewow....MEOW!!" and then their cheeks wabbled and shot out lazers, and destroyed the eiffel tower, and then it crashed on top of them (this is when u thought there was an earthquake, lynith) and tehn i saved the day. Again.

    AND thats the real story.

    btw, im still dead.

  16. LOL Volcaneo-gods quote!

    I visited the doctor and told him can i use his tardis. He said no and i punched him thats why his jaw is like it is.

  17. Ah, HB, I think this is the beginning of your nickname:


    everyones doing alternate quotes and stuff, so i guess ill do one too.

    (LOL, Derek, so much for my supposed "Loyalty")


    -Hellboy, as he smashes his "red" hand onto a car in peak-hour traffic.

    (haha, you know, cos, like, TRAFFIC LIGHTS? Heh-eh, you know? No? You've never seen traffic lights? Oh...)

    1. And here is a slight continuation of the scenario:


      Minnie apoligised, Inferno Joe turned into Hellboy and the Naomi took back Minnie's apolygy.

    2. Ah! Continuation!


      I know who can solve this problem.
      Inferno Joe.
      Hellyboy walks up.
      Hey I thought you were dead.
      Oh Yeah, but I also turned into Hellboy.
      TRUE. Look can you stop the fighting.
      Hellboy/Inferno Joe stops the problem with a solution no one remembers, but anyway we can all forget about what happened now.OK

    3. [Geckogirl]

      you saved the day inferno joe/hellboy and you don't even know it. and you probably never will as its not a computer day for you today!

  18. "Vengeous scowled. 'As you can see,' he said, 'you are vastly outnumbered.'

    I usually am.'

    Your situation has become quite untenable.'

    It usually does.'

    You are within moments of being swarmed by these filthy creatures of undeath and torn apart in a maelstrom of pain and fury.'

    Skulduggery paused. 'Okay, that's a new one on me."

  19. [Geckogirl]
    One day (erm today)in the heart of Ireland Derek Landy was typing away on his laptop finishing the 6th skulduggery plesant book. But suddenly his laptop crashed before he could save it.
    "no....what have I done?" he cried. "A whole book gone! NOOOOOOO!!"
    Meanwhile in the Gecko cave (dramatic duddly-do du-du-duddly do) *camera zooms in on Geckogirl licking an ice-cream* "Hey!" she said. "Carn't a girl and her friend eat ice-creams in peace? Ain't that right Skulduggery?"
    *Skulduggery looks up at camera* "Mine's vanilla flavour!" he stated. *Pause* "erm yeah Skulduggery, yeah it is....." Geckogirl said.
    Skulduggery tilted his head slightly and said "Wait......I feel a's kinda like the feeling that part of you has been erased from a book. Do you know that feeling?"
    Before Geckogirl could reply Lynith and Naomi burst into the cave arguing with eachother. Straight after them Hellboy/Inferno joe appeared and he said..............

    allright allright, lets be havin yers' (in a geordie accent of course- dont know why though) 'Ok, so I know we've ad our ups 'n downs but nows not the time to be fightin like the bloomin boy's in blue for goodness sakes!'

    Lynith and Naomi both look ashamed and go to the freezer and pick out icecreams so they don't feel left out. Geckogirl then shouts, 'Oi they're my icecreams!!' and Naomi and Lynith both stick out their tongues at her, look at each other and burst out laughing. Then Skulduggery says impationatly, 'no really you guys, some part of me has deffinatly been erased because I can't remember my real date of birth anymore!!!

    1. [Skyril]
      Skulduggery then said, "Wait I can't even taste this ice cream anymore!" everyone in the room looks at him knowingly.Then Geckogirl says, "Um yes Skul you're a don't have taste buds..."
      "Oh that's right.I had forgotten.That still seems unfair that *just* because I'm a skeleton I can't taste ice cream!" everyone laughs and tolls their eyes.Then Skyril walks in and says, "Hey yall!Guess what!

      while hey were talkiing, Insnaity also sensed the distrubance, so she sent out a mesenger cupcake to notifiy them. it arrived shortly, and it said the following: there has beena disturbance in the skulduggery world.pleasae arrive at te purple ocean to e a debreifing. you may take the included flying carpet. they looked up to see a shag rug flying around. they arrived at the la-ar to to find insanity seated at a table. "ok" she said "book six has been lost" the others all but became emo at the loss. "we need to get it bac, but i dont wanna go to the troble of make in a picture that would fix all of it, so we are going on a big hard quest! tll me all that we will need"

      So they all thought really hard before Skul says, 'well we will need transport...' Everyone groans and rolls their eyes before Naomi says, 'we can take my super duper car, it's quite nice really.' and they all smile, relief plastered onto their faces. However Skullduggery, now realising that actually no one like's his choice in cars even though he thought they were quite cool, goes off to sulk in a corner....

      [irresistibly EVIL!!!!}
      Irresistably EVIL!!! rises from a secret panal in the floor. "what??? is it something cool? did dark days come to the U.S??? did you get a puppy? IS ANYONE GONNA SHARE SOME ICE CREAM WITH MEEEE?!?!?" everyone turns to skyril exspectantly whilst Irresistably EVIL!!! has a mental break down on the floor. "well" skyril says hesitantly "Skulduggery," Hellboy/inferno joe screams in desperation "WHAT?!?!?! WHAT IS IT?!?!? SPEAK WOMAN!!! AND SOMEONE REMEMBER THAT I'M HERE!!!" "we can't" replied Skulduggery "you haven't put on you special magical underware today, and everyone knows that if you are in the cave, you have to have them on or else no one can see or hear you." everyone chimes in "YEAH!!!" Hellboy/ inferno joe walks dejectedly out the cave entrance. "as i was saying before i was so rudley interuppted Skulduggery," "Hmmm??? oh, yes! now what was it you wanted to tell me skyril, hurry now my ice cream's melting." skyril just stared at him for a while, watching as a stream of vanilla ice cream flowed down (and stained)the arm of his wonderfully tailored and stylish suit. "peh, okay everyone get ready for this. what has just happened to me will affect ALL of you. it will cause a panic all through my nieghborhood and will probably slowly kill each and every one of you standing in this room." skyril pauses for dramitic effect and takes a deep, shuddering breath. "my mom... is making me play... the" at this point, skyril is nearly sobbing " is making me play, the TUBA!!!" as this horrible news washes over the ears of the group. Skulduggery's phone rings. it had caller id on it 'cause he could afford fancy gadgits and he liked to freak people out be answering the phone with their name. "hello Derek. how are you today. you must hurry because there is a dramitic situation here and i have yet to act accordingly." "Skulduggery, i must tell you, a terrible, terrible thing has happened." "those kinds of things usually do"

    2. [Insanity]
      Insanity took out a huge book, and begane flipping through it."ok, we got transportation, food, entertainment, awsome little me..." she rambled on, toching each picture as she came to it, and it appeared beside them. "we shall allsol need to stop by one of our friends to get gadets and stuff."

      "Great let's go!" said Lynith.
      So they all got into Naomi's car and set off to Odile who had all the cool gadgety stuff.
      But as soon as the gang saw Odile Geckogirl ran screaming wildly at Odile screaming "You got my name wrong!" but just before she slammed into Odile Geckogirl got distracted by an alpaca standing to the left.
      Everyone rolled their eyes at Geckogirl while she petted the Alpaca (called Ronald) and they all continued to plan on how to get book 6 back.
      Just as they were disscussing this Skulduggery screamed in pain.
      "What's wrong Skulduggery?" Odile asked.
      Skulduggery paused a moment then he said "who the hell is Skulduggery?"

      "what do you mena who is skuduggery?"
      "i dont know who i am or wh you are talking about"
      they turned to insnaity who was playing the piano. Skyril sighed, and said "isanity, if you are going to play the piano, please just make ita bit less annoying"
      "ok, but the olny non anoying ones are unsuspenceful" replided insanity, taking out a hormonica. "puh puh puuuuhhh" she played then she ook out her cupcake book and gave skulduggery a memory cupcake, which gave him back memory of his name and stuff

      Once Skulduggery was feeling better they all clambered into Naomi's car to set of for Derek Landy's house to see what he knew of the missing book. But because Odile joined them there wasnt enough room in the car so geckogirl decided to ride on Ronald the alpaca behind them while Skulduggery held her ice-crem (yes,another one)
      The gang were driving down the road singing 'under pressure' by Queen while Skulduggery groaned about our taste in cars.
      But suddenly from out of the blue something stepped infront of the car. It was......

      a pink panther!Geckogirl, who was driving the car, swerved off the rode into a ditch!Skyril said,"what on earth is a panther doing here?'Tis rare to see one in these parts, and what an odd color."The panther looked at us cautiously.Odile, who was rummaging through her leather bag of gadgets proclaimed, "I can take care of this!"She had in her hand a strange device that looked like a mechanical triangle with lots of apparently random circles and designs.One side was open and the other two closed but for a few small holes.She pulled herself from the tipped car up to the side of the rode,turned a few odd knobs on her triangle, and brought the open side up to cover her mouth.She slowly walked toward the panther and started....yowling?Geckogirl nodded in her direction approvingly and said, "Aha great choice of gadget!Do you know what she's doing?" Everyone stared at her rather blankly.So she told them, "she speaking to it!".....

    3. [random comment here by me: By the way, Joe (you do get on today don't you??)
      just so you know, you are now Hellboy.We officially decided on that while you weren't here ^.^
      (by the way, Lyneth and I continues the story in different ways here...)]

      It was postman Pat, the officail postman for the COBPUDLGAP group (which is what the expedition group was now officialy called). Naomi (whom was driving) slammed on the brakes and the wheels groaned in protest as they suddenly stopped, a mer few inches away from postman Pat's nose. They all sat. They all stared... Odile almost had a heart attack. Then postman pat steps up to the car door and knocks on the window. As Naomi winds it down slowly, the rest of the car sit in shocked silence. Dutifully handing over a cream envalope, Pat nod's, get back into his red postman van, and drives off into the distance.

      'Open it then,' said Skulduggery, impationatly...

      [Geckogirl continues story from my way]
      "Ohhhh!" everyone sed! So Odile told the pink panther where they were going and why and the pink panther told her that he was sorry he disturbed them and he'll be on his way to paris again now. And then he gave each of us a complementary pen and slunk off. But it wasnt just any pen it was a............

      [Geckogirl continues story from Lyneth's way]
      Inside the letter they found a gold pen along with a note. Note read ' I know what you search for and I have information on what you seek. This pen shall help you find me. It's not just any pen its a.............

      [Insanity Lyneth's]
      its was a pen that wrote magical golden ink! when they took out a compas, they wrote on the difernt arrows, and the one that glowed was the way they neded to go. there was only one problem. it said they had to go through a casm with snakes, spiders, clowns, and pionty sticks. All but insanity stared, stared, for she had a plan. "ok first we...

      Aaanannnnd then it kinda just disappears... BUT THERE'S THE STORY

      Also, the date you first logged on with Hellboy as your username and icon: June 16, 2010 at 9:49 AM

      LOL, the comment is too loong >.< ~chops it in half-ish~

  20. Hehe, to think you've been having fun all day [and probably still are], and I've been sleeping through them.
    Isn't that just odd??


  22. Hey! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Great post! I loved the part when Scar opened the lock. It surprised me. Good job. She's a surprising girl, it seems, as she surprised me again when I found out she was John's sister. John was cool. The way he murdered that evil snake man! Raphael was interesting. He explained, more directly that you had to be magic to jump into paintings, something which my dumb mortal brain wouldn't get at first. I thought it was funny you used the name Pendragon, because I thought that was the name of the story about he kid who could go into paintings and save the world. But that was Charlie Bone, a book which I never read because of my friends horrific display over it. Raphael is a bit bad at physics though. Though he did live back in 1936 in Romania. SEE? I read it this time :) It was worth it! Catcha later!

  23. Happy birthday Brother Joe *hugs* (I think Sky needs a noogie) XD
    Heck, I'll give you both a noogie! YAY!
    Thanks for the post!

  24. I swear that I posted happy birthday on here... I remember, we were just about to go boating and I was typing really quick so I probably would have said 'HAPPY BITHDAY!!!!!!??!!' being me...

    So, because Blogger assassinated my comment in cyber space, I shall wish you a happy birthday again and apologise about the lateness of this comment.