Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Always someone better.

Always. No matter where you go, there'll always be someone better. I used to think I was good at poetry, until he came along. Used to think I was good at drawing, until I met her. Used to think I was kind, modest, the kind of guy you look up to. 'till I met them.

Always someone more popular, nicer, faster, taller, stronger, closer to the people you want to be closer to...

Heh. Used to think I was a respected bloglandian, holding the title of being one of the oldest, or something. To hell with that. It's an empty title.

Used to think that I didn't complain a lot, at least I was optimistic. Until I met better people.

Stick to your strengths, Joe. You're good at writing. Yeah, but so is he. Except he's better at it. And that person over there is better at maths. That girl over there aces English when you know you should be. That friend isn't lazy. They're always motivated.

Even as I say this, there's always someone who has it worse than me. Even as I get, for want of a better word, bullied in school, there's always someone who knows much more pain than I could ever take. Some are right here, some will comment on this post. And instead of being like I am, and complaining to everyone about how shitty their life is, those people stay strong. They are stronger than me. They keep quiet, and put up with it, and are the better person, in the end.

I'm not wired that way. I put up with a small amount and can't take it. I burden others with it.

I don't share everything. Now, in the heat of this moment, I feel like telling it all. Saying "You know what? You're an arse. Here's ten reasons why..." to half a dozen people. But that would get me no-where. None would be on my side. That's the problem with hating popular people. Online and offline.

Edit: I'm sorry, I had a rather shitty first day back at school today. Plus, the hell is up with this Blogland Elders idea? You know what's going to happen. No offence to the newer Bloggers who run Derek's, but they'll be the only ones to be chosen. Older Bloglandians will just be forgotten. And there's that selfish streak returning again, sorry. I'll go and think of other times I've made posts like this, and how I realised what huge mistakes they were afterwards.


  1. Hellboy man - you gotta stop douubting yourself..
    You will come to terms with the fat that there will ALWAYS be someone better than you, but the thing is, there will ALWAYS be someone better than THEM - Somewhere in the world, people are born with the ability to do things without any work at all...
    Just because you have to work harder does not make you anything less than them. The fact that they may be better at something does not make them better people than you...
    You are one of the most amazing people that i've ever met; you're fun, honest, welcoming, and a brilliant writer (great at setting a scene) :)

    So please dont try and compare yourself to others - the majority of the time, they aren't worth eve half of what you are as a person, they only care about themselves and their own ends.

  2. Hellboy-sucks that you had a bad first day at school :( Sorry man.
    But so what if there are people better than you at something? Does that make them a better person than you? No. Because in all likelihood you are better than them at something else.
    You can't live your life comparing it to others. It'll just make you feel bad because there is always someone who is better than you at something.
    But you are unique. There is no-one else on this Earth quite like you. And you should be proud of that. I'm me and the hell to the ones who don't like it. I love my differences, my strengths and my weaknesses because they make me, ME and me is AWESOME.
    To quote Jenna Marbles-
    Please watch it. She says everything I want to say. And it applies to everyone.

  3. You know, being the worst at everything I can think of, I'd like to think there's someone always better so we can strive to be better. Even the smartest people have someone who's better at them with something, so that person it always trying to be better. It's all in a sense of improving on yourself.

    And maybe the "new people" would be choosen because they don't know you. They only know what others have told them, and most of it isn't nice. It's because, by staying away, you're not proving us right or wrong. Most of us have no reason to vote for you people. You're people who used to come on the blog, and who others told us none of you are any good. So, I'd ask again, why don't you come back? I still don't understand why you choose to be on chats, and still call yourself bloglandians. The divide between us is still there. Kal's on the blog. She's got friends there.
    You think you'll be forgotten? Even without the elder vote, people have already forgoten you. I don't get why you choose to be on chat. Maybe I never will. But, I ask again, please, everyone, come back to blogland

  4. Oh, and just so you know, I don't think the elder idea's going forward. So many of the "new people" were against it

  5. I hear you, man. Thought I was great at writing. Til I came here, everyone's better than me. You know the worst thing you can get is a sympathy comment? Jeez. Thought I was the tall one. Kapow, that's gone. Thought I was the one who loves reading. Nope. Thought I was great at acting. I'm still fighting for that one.

    I've come to realize that it's not what youre good at, or what you like. Few people are remembered for things like that, and when they are, it's pretty much ONLY that. I remember people by their personality, their overall attitude towards things. Right now, I'm thinking that's better than being known for something in particular, coz there'll be plenty of others.

    And don't worry bout the the elder thing. If you won't call the police, I'll tell you I didn't vote ;)

  6. @Nixion

    That was a really rude comment you posted. You know nothing about Hellboy because you haven't asked. You listened to people when they said we were bad--that's bias. I think you need to learn to collect all findings before looking at the facts.

    As for why we left the blog: People were complaining we were spamming. Too many people--we were forced to leave so we wouldn't be attacked anymore. This is another example of your stupidity. Bias, bias, bias. You don't seek two sides of a story, do you? I guess not.

    Next time, you might want to because you could lose everyone over being so naive.

    1. Actually, no, if you read carefully, I never said I think that you're bad. I said we were told a lot of things like that, and nothing was proved right of wrong

    2. It was the way your comment was written that came across as insensitive. Don't take it as an attack. You were told things that were false - did you make an effort to uncover the truth?

      Why would anyone make an effort to be around you if you wont make an effort to try and know who they actually are...?

    3. I made an effort. I came to the chat, I came to the blogs. I tried to get to know you
      And the stupid comment came out as a little bit of an attack...

    4. I think Gepard was more just venting his frustrations, wrong time, wrong place. But fair enough. I wouldn't know what went on with others because i wasn't on the chats I've just recently come back after like a year...

      The thing is though, even if you made an effort - you're one person out of how many that frequent the blogs? How many other TRULY made an effort?

    5. Well, isn't it safe to say that rarely an effort was made by anyone?

    6. You can say whatever you wish to say. It doesn't change what happened and it doesn't change the fact that a lot of us had to leave the blog for personal reasons, aside from anything that was actually happening on the blog.

      You assume what you don't know. A lot of people made an effort to be on the blogs but simply couldn't. Once you get towards the end of high school, especially if you're actually wanting to get into a decent profession, any time aside from work is usually taken up by sleep. That isn't even taking into consideration family commitments and work commitments along with any other myriad of things that may be happening.

      We made an effort to stay on. Just because others have the time to be on every single day does not mean that we did not make an effort with what little time we had. Moving to the chats may have been simpler and more efficient for some people. I don't know, i didn't use them. But i don't make claims that they ran away to the chats like it was done in spite of any newer people.

    7. Whatever man, just goooo with the floooo...
      Sorry, just had a hippie moment there...

    8. Ahahaa, whatever floats your boat :P

    9. Stop working against the current. Floooo with it... be the current man. I stoped knowing what I was talking about a looooong time ago.

  7. *hugs Hellboy*
    I know how you feel.
    But like others have said in their comments, there is always going to be someone better than you at something, but then you can better than them at something else.
    Everyone is Equal, no one is better than another person.
    All you can do, is strive to do better. Some stuff comes more naturally to some people over others.
    You're still fantastic. You are funny and awesome.
    Just remember that.

  8. Aw, Hellboy, I have so much to say right about now.
    ~Hugs tight~
    Ok, dude, you are AWESOME in SO many ways! There's no one like YOU anywhere. You're original, you're awesome, you're brilliant.
    You're creative and think up all kinds of things, and I go, "Wow! That was INCREDIBLE! I wish I would have thought up doing that!"

    Oh, and Hellboy, don't ever feel like you can't talk to us. Sure, some people PROBABLY have it worse out there somewhere in the world, but who cares, everybody needs to say what he thinks and to make people understand sometimes.
    Sometimes, I just really wish some people could take over my body for a day and feel everything I feel and see and do what I do, so that they KNOW how I feel because people get it wrong about people so very often.
    ~hugs~ You can always talk to us is what I mean. Don't hold it in because I've done that too much, and it's really much better if you talk to someone about it, and we're always here if you need to talk to us. God, too, of course, is ALWAYS there. Unfortunately, you and I are not online at the same time very often, but you can ALWAYS, ALWAYS send me an email, and I'll always reply.

    There's so much I want to say, and I don't even know how to say it all.
    Hellboy, you're AMAZING! You're a brilliant friend and a brilliant writer, and by GEORGE you're someone I look up to. VERY much.
    So often I think, "Ha! He's so funny!" or, "Hellboy is just brilliant!" or, "I wish I could be more like him sometimes!" And all other kinds of things.
    I definitely look up to you. You're the perfect kind of person TO look up to because you are VERY kind and considerate, you stick up for your friends, and you're clever, and I could go on for a really long time.

    Honestly, I don't share HALF as much as I want to usually. Sometimes at night before I fall asleep- in that moment between wakefulness and slipping off- I start thinking about things-thinking about conversations I COULD have. Then before I fall asleep, I realize I never could because no one would understand.
    I'm not sure if I REALLY believe that or I just don't want to talk about it, but I know how you feel in that case.
    Hellboy, you can talk to us about anything. I even think I would highly agree with you on things. There are a lot of people I sometimes just want to shove into a corner and yell at for half an hour, but I'm too afraid of hurting someone's feelings or not saying it right or something so I never do.
    Really, I should though, or at least I should talk to someone about it. I keep thinking about it, and still, I think the person wouldn't understand and wouldn't agree with me. ~shrugs~ Maybe we both should anyway. Get it out. I doubt it's good for out health. xD

    Sorry. Too long. Let me post the rest in a second comment.

  9. One thing about the popular people-
    Generally, they're stupid and have no reason to be popular.
    Otherwise, they make dumb decisions, but they're too popular for people to properly correct.
    I get it, dude, trust me -_-

    Another thing I need to say- Ok, so maybe there are some people who do things better than you, but YOU do things better than other people a LOT. You're SO talented, so clever, brimming with ideas. All the time, you're a genius.
    Don't compare yourself to other people because there's no point. You're brilliant, and that's that.

    I'm jumping from thing to thing here without any good sense of order, but I gotta say:
    You want to know something? I talk to inanimate objects when I'm upset. I'm too cowardly, honestly, to say what I think.
    I love that you don't really do that. You say the truth, and you say what needs to be said.

    Oh, and I know how you feel about Blogland... I was annoyed and disappointed with the Blogland Awards, actually.
    I mean... I'm sure the people who got what they got deserved it, but they left SO many out! SO many that I thought REALLY fit the description one way or another. :/
    I guess there's nothing we can do..., but Kal and I were thinking about holding another awards with other winners because there are so many who deserve things! Maybe we CAN do that.
    I really think we should do it.

    I haven't heard about this Elder business, but I won't be surprised if it goes through the same way :/
    It's disappointing. Yes, we haven't gone to the blog as often as we once did, but there are REASONS for that...
    We were all really important at one time, and I'm surprised so many have forgotten- don't even care or remember. They don't know us, I guess...
    I guess I shouldn't be so annoyed, but I sort of am.
    We brought Blogland up from its infancy, and we're still here today. That means something. To me it does, anyway.
    Maybe the new people don't know us, but the old ones do, and they remember...
    Derek Landy remembers, I'm sure of it.
    I guess these are all that *really* matter, anyway.

    Oh, and if "elders" ARE selected... well, I have to say, I highly doubt I'll honor them. The Blog's for fun anyway, why on earth would anyone want to give it a government?

    Ok, I've started rambling. Actually.., I might have been rambling for some time now xD
    Sorry, Hellboy.

    My point was, in the beginning, that you're AWESOME!
    And that's that. Pointless to compare yourself to anyone else because you're EPICA, and there's no changing that. Ever. :3

  10. Hellboy, you're my friend, my excellent, amazing, fantastic friend.
    Don't judge yourself like that because it's silly. You know why? No? Well, I'll tell you: it's because you're kind and clever and great.
    ~hugs tight~
    You always have, and you always will be :]
    Give the morons a punch in the nose for me, will ya? ;]

    Sorry for the long comments xD

  11. group hug!

    *everyone backs away*

    dammit not again...

    I don't think there's a problem with the way you're wired. I'm not saying you're fault-less, because we ALL have faults. But the faults we have do not define the faliure or success we may achieve. It does not limit us, nor set us free. We are designed to be different, and the fact that we even exist right now, despite all the natural disasters and wars and rebellions that have taken place on this Earth, is a wonderful, beautiful thing. I try to embrace that because it makes me realize that what we are is connected. We're linked, despite geographical location, and that's the point of existing. It's about building the world together... even though, we are just as likely to ruin it before we improve it.

    I struggle with this a lot, the idea that someone is better than I am. It's not that I'm competitive, but it's the idea that because something is better... I should leave them to it, right? Let them do the thing I love because what's the point in me trying a thousand times when someone will get it right on the first attempt?

    That's wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong. And yet, I can't help but think it! Why? Because that's the way we are. We compare. We want to be better, we want to be someone else because that's what the image of perfection is, isn't it? To be better?

    Again, no. It's not that at all. How do we define better anyway? It can't be HOW someone writes, because everyone has a different preference. It can't be WHY someone does something, because people have a range of reasons for their actions. And it can't be WHO they are, because your name doesn't make a difference to your talent. Better, in my eyes, is what you want to be. And the thing is, you can never reach it. Because when you become as good as the person who you compared yourself to before, you'll find another human who you believe is better than you. So you work and work and work until you're like them, and then you find someone else. Then someone else. And then someone else. It's an on going cycle with no end.

    aaaaaaaand that's where your friends come in. Because we're here to remind you that - yeah. Someone out there is better than you at something. BUT THAT DOESN'T MATTER!!! Know why? It's because they aren't you, and that's what sets you apart. We do not have the relationship with them that we have with you (so basically, you're better at making derek-tastic friends ;)) which means that to us, it doesn't matter. You're still you. And that's why we love you, silly.

    Yes, we are all equal to each other. But if I'm honest, I like to think that as individuals there is no 'better'. Like in Harry Potter, the world is not split into good people and death eaters. Therefore, the world is not split into people who are better and people who suck. We're all human, and just because you measure yourself as less than someone else, doesn't mean everyone else does too.

    What I'm getting at here is that you're amazing, Hellboy. You're always here to talk to, and you're hilarious, and you're loyal to your friends. Hold onto that. Don't let the idea of being greater linger for too long, because we don't want someone who thinks they're 'better'. We just want you, whether you've got four faults or four thousand - we don't care.

    Don't believe that you don't matter, because you do. And the idea that you are worthless due to the characteristics and skills of someone else, is the biggest lie of all.

    *hugs you all tightly as you discretely try to run away*

    1. LENKA!
      First off ~points Hellboy to this post~




    2. *is tackled*


      HIYA! :D *waves*

    3. HIYA!
      Lenka! Oh, my goodness, it's been FAR too long!
      It's so good to see you!

    4. It has! I'm sorry - I should be able to get online more, since I only have a couple more days at school before the Summer holidays :D
      Same to you! How are you?

    5. ~cuddles back~
      That sounds like some really good news :D
      You know about chatzy, right?
      Oh, me? I'm... mostly good :P
      Well, we just bought a new house!

    6. I've used chatzy before, but not with other blogspot-ers. Do we have one set up for Skulduggery fans now or...?
      That's cool! Moving is always exciting, or at least, I think it is! :D

    7. Hey lenka *waves*

      Agree with you completely on your post :)

  12. *chases after Lenka with a butterfly net*

    1. KALLISTA! ^-^

      *snuggles with you*

      Hi! Hello! Bonjour! Hola! YO!

  13. Listen, Hellboy. Read the comments your friends have left, and read them again. We love you. It doesn't matter if someone is better than you at something. YOU ARE YOU! And you are and always will be the best you, and because of that, the things you do will always be your best. If you end up outdoing yourself, then you are still doing your best, have still BEEN doing your best.

    No one can write like you. No one can draw like you. Why? They're not you. You are the best at doing things your way. Other people aren't "better". They're just doing things their way, and you shouldn't compare yourself to them. It's hard not to, I know. I do it all the time, even though I know it a bad thing to do.

    I'm sorry that you had a bad day back at school, and that those people don't treat you as well as they should. But never, ever be worried about coming to talk to us. We will not judge you. We will listen, and comfort, and understand as best we can, because you've done that for us, and because you're our friend.

    And now I leave you with a quote. It's cheesy, but it's true.

    "Be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here" - Desiderata

  14. Replies
    1. *looks down to see Thalia clinging to her leg*

      Hey! Wanna join the group-hug thing we've got going on? :D

    2. *pulls you into group hug anyway*

    3. Group hugs are good.

      *cuddles with the group hug people*

    4. Yay! Hugs all round! :D

    5. Everyone needs hugs *nods*

      *gets ready to chase and tackle hug the people who say otherwise*

  15. Replies
    1. Sam is SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPING! And as for me, I have to go and dig back through the blog to find the rest of the awards and post them onteh blog. WISH ME LUCK!
      *flies away on her stolen Harry Potter broom* REG >:D